Written by: Pana •
June 17, 2009
Sitting here with my ipod playing in the back ground Ashanti “Baby” is playing while I’m cooking about to unwind and write this blog. Today I was thinking about this person……… I remember the sweet nothings he used to whisper when thought no one was looking. Find a way just to see me -a master mind– hmmmmm fast forward to the rendezvous the wanting the yearning the thrill of the chase ……..Steamy shower scene leads to nothing (arrggh)…. The plan is in motion I can leave but I don’t. I know I wanted it, but trying to find an excuse go there are plenty.There is no going back, I think I might stay. It’s getting late placed that last phone call, just then I see you, you grab my hand lead me into a safe heaven -end scene-. Nervous but quite interested legs shaking. I want to see if the Persona and Ego live up in this moment ….hmmmm OK. It’s a wrap ! The beginning of the end, Stealing moments. Rose petals,candles, bubble baths, many first times later..*Sigh*. That NY fitted, black leather, jeans, boots my dude was on punto! *Lust* Many promises not met. You a nomad, Me the air. You like to wander, I need to feel free like gypsy, I don’t do confinement well I need to feel I’m partly in control. Certain things still make me smile and this is almost a decade old..Sometimes when your doing your wrap up (shall I say archives of past lives) the mental rewind is necessary. 4 moves later still standing still. Fond memories that need to stay there. You are missed but like almost everything in life the expiration date had come. My Beautiful Nightmare (Sade -Somebody already Broke My Heart playing now)…I’m still dreaming….They will never truly know what could have been. The kinda movement that can not be taught only understood. My friend till the end. A figment of my imagination, something I never had, someone I never knew, but I seen it clear as day. WOW. I guess I should go back to sleep even though I feel I have been sleep long enough, well rested. I’m awake everything looks different From free from dreamland. I’m refreshed. Time to come out of hibernation and play with the other animals. Donnell Jones -Where I Wanna Be- playing in background.
WTF am I talking about ? I’m high ….lmao
**END SCENE**
Pero…tu sabe! Cause um that was some real high shit to ponder about and freestyle on…but damn after 9 yrs being outta highschool I wanna know how is it that I can totally feel u….and still smdh?!?!?!? WOW! str8 up talk to politic over some herbal remedies! Honestly….its the tiniest of things that “My Usual Attraction”-type guys make me do too!
“My friend till the end. A figment of my imagination, something I never had, someone I never knew, but I seen it clear as day”—hahaha….2009-2010 *DEAD* on that FOREVER4RIGHT now hombre! LOL…”Change your requirements to fulfill your happiness” So much easier said then done when personally matters of the heart sometimes do require some FINE COMBING through and severe attention to detail…sh*t..<—must think now am I high replying? LMFAoooooooooo….
It wasn’t about Forever for right now…not only that I do see some exact instances. things that make you go hmmmmm