Written by: Pana •
July 27, 2012
You were my Neo, short days endless nights.
My first in many ways, too smooth your own good
or should I say mine!
It was wrong from the start, something forbidden yet so necessary.
You came at the right time elevated me to
a higher level, but at the same time
did the most damage.
This heart will never heal,broken beyond repair.
Having half of you is like
being a crack
addict only allowed one hit off of the pipe.
You tried your best but,
your demons are too strong.
Your taste for addiction and lust kept us
apart.
The greatest friend I will ever have,
The greatest lover I never had
The girl is now
a woman
The man is still only half in some ways.
She roams the world alone
while
he has the world on his shoulders.
No one will ever understand
her pain or his.
Perfect match but timing is off. Timing will never be
right when You’re not neo.
Days are now shorter priorities differ.
She yearns for depth, intensity, passion
and
someone to reciprocate the same consistency.
Wow consistency
No better yet most of all Stability.
She never had any
it’s important
He wants his cake and it too,
unfortunately it is no longer an option.
A good man still,
but she isn’t good enough.
She gave numerous chances, he accepted w/ no sign of change.
So she pulls out of the race.
Finally at peace with the past, just wanted a future.
She will never love another
ever !
The loyalty will always remain for the one
who got away,
and broke her heart
indefinitely.
The realest shit I ever wrote.
ReSpEcT,
Pana
Sheeet…..truth talk my niggy…i got some thangs i can offer to you i’ve been working on….but yep yep….Steadily want to talk about “a Good girl GONE….” to even continue calling u a girl after all this time and not officially realizing that WOMANHOOD approached long before you ever became bad…….Geez….to the heart that was broken ain’t nothing like the experience of knowing how ALIVE you are until something like heartbreak brings it all back into perspective….
dot dot dot…Ciao!
Who’s bad ? (in my MJ voice) lmao. Seriously that really is the question :oT
Imma tell u who’s bad the 1 who really lost! U can’t be all ur desires want u to be when ur responsibilities cause u to be SOME1 else! Pero..yo ne se where they do that @?
True I think everyone struggles with the person the want to and the person they have to be. You can only try but so much, then for your well being you have to let to avoid being bitter. Some people realize what they lost and some never do because to them it isn’t a loss.
Oohh you mentioned a great point “BECOMING BITTER” hmmm how many of us has that happened too? Being or becoming bitter took some time especially in women..now don’t get it twisted there are alotta bitter MEN walking around shadowing that shit in ur direction long before Mr. “Coulda Been Wonderful” said hello….
They comes a point in a women’s life when she has to step back, open her eyes real WIDE and analyze what is going on around her. When you come out of that trance will he still be standing there? Was he ever really there? Was it my imagination? THANKS for the dream, the fairytale…Can a broken heart be repaired?
That is the realest shyt you ever wrote!!! U ALREADY KNOW…(in my deep gangsta voice)
I will have to say YES a broken heart can be fixed…I don’t believe as women OUR lives are dependent on if he really understands how multi-faceted WE really are…sure..”i can dig it…u gotta do you”…maybe its not something they believe we can REALLY mean. At this moment…in my current lifetime…today….I CAN’T BE STAGNATED… these such times in our lives when we have to “Step Back” might be the just right turning point that we NEED 2 fully understand what it is that we at least DON”T WANT anymore…whats so selfish about that? Time…time..heals a broken heart..we got that “COMEBACK”! If u don’t believe it involve urself in something that takes up ur time..u’ll see =)
Damn you have been living my life…..that was some sit down and smoke a L after reading shit.
Lmao @ MR Coulda been wonderful. Yes a broken heart can be repaired. Women get right back on the horse and try again. I’m not expecting perfection just respect. If we are together we are together not half or sometimes after a certain amount of time I feel like you should know what you wnat period. Don’t string people along it’s childish and unbecoming male/or female. I want to know that I know that I know , and there is nothing wrong with wanting that. I don’t want have to worried about where you sleeping and if push comes to shove you are not standing by myside. One thing that any dude can say that was in a RELATIONSHIP with me ( not messing with i’m talking full commitment) is my loyalty. It is unquestionable and that’s one of the things I brings to the table. I sleep with a clear mind. That’s all I want in return I solid foundation and family.
Hey lady, i write about what your talking about all the time….I’m having a showcase this Thursday….performing my new song i wrote called “HOOKED”..hmm appropriate title at just the right time. Come see me this Thursday if u can in BK….later.
Talk di tings dem (in my Tony Matterhorn voice). I have been through a very similar situation (as you know), but as much as I loved my Mr. it just couldn’t work. They say love conquers all. I beg to differ, time conquers all. If you love someone but you are on different accords, you have no emotional harmony. Having the ingredients doesn’t make you a cook. It’s knowing what and when to work with them. When I look back I realize that after 5 long years I took nothing from my “relationship” but that fact that a perfect love, perfect time, is nothing but a perfect impossibility.
Ciao Bella,
SBZ–living single and cynical…yearning to be a believer
I agree on the perfection aspect because sometimes we seek perfection even though we are not. It’s a cold cold world. But I can honestly say that I have learned, and gain a valuable assest. All of my other relationships previously were a absolute waste. I have grown and blossom. Dust yourself off and try again is my motto. Will I be extra cautious yes. But i’m a sucka for love , but Imma G and real gangstaz don’t play around lol. But now I know what I want. This isn’t an isolated incident this shit happens daily every break up might not be as bad but you always have that one that changes your life….or that shit can be a wake up call you give the man and woman in your life to put things into perspective. SHit should change for the better because like Loreal says on the commerical “you’re worth it”
@Socialbutterflies great comment but I know your a believer you are just on Hiatus
@ Shakira yes I will do send me your info I am interesting in going and possibly feature you on here :o) thanks for the love boo
OOh ladies…you guys truely know…isn’t it strange we can point out WHAT WE DON”T want..but when it gets right down to it what are the things we really want not what we say…even when things aren’t GREAT…even when the chips fall etc…@Panaj..no doubt i will forward info…I know TyNitty gonna show…like she say “SUPPORT SUMMER 09” Imma dm u info owww!
@shakira yes or email them to me.
So true we sometimes know off the bat what we don’t want like dude go <—— that way. But when we are in relationships especially serious one’s we tolerate so much more. I think it hurts us even more. I guess you have to set the standard from the time they fuck up like hell to da naw and mean it. because all people male / female will take advatange like whatever and keep doing it. We have to stick to our morals and principles bottom line !
Very deep! Very true! Always seems tht ppl who luv each other so much still find it hard to make it work. There’s always tht one who got away…or tht one u had to let go of! And u move on–which is diff at first but gets easier with time! U live and u learn! “Realest shyt u ever wrote” indeed! Two thumbs up!
I think I used to get it twisted by saying “As long you love each other it will work” in reality it is so much more than that.
~If someone whether it be male/ or female wants to be with you nothing will stop them not a wife, children, distance etc they will do whatever it take to make the relationship work. ~
I am co-signing with the last comment….my grandmama said to me…AIN’T NOTHING GONNA STOP A LONELY HEART…NOT THE MOONS NOT THE STARS…IF YOU WANT HIM/HER NOTHING WILL STOP YOU! Pow….
Gurlllllll!!! I swear u were in my head as you wrote this blog. I guess there r lots of females going thru the same situations just on a different day. I love that u expressed it though…..
Yooo, i love it. I think anyone who has ever really loved someone and had their heart broken can relate. Some guys have to learn the hard way an dthere’s absolitely NOTHING u can do or say to pursuade them. ive learned that you can give someone the world but you cant make them love u back. however i do believe all broken hearts can be healed, so i never want you to give up on love, cause it’s the greatest gift God ever gave us…….
-nani
Woooooow, is this from a woman scorn or a woman that finally woke up and smelled the coffee. This is often the scenario after we analyze a relationship that didn’t work out. I honestly think no matter what a person does to you, that you shouldn’t let that change who you are, why give them that satisfaction, we live an we learn. Everything we go through is not by accident but life’s obstacle course to makes us stronger for the next hurdle or better yet battle which we may encounter. I agree a broken heart can be mended the love we know isn’t always the love we need. When its all said and done we realize damn maybe that wasn’t love after we find out what true love really is, but that remains to be seen and the you’ll be the judge.
Chad,
this is about expressing emotion after you break up nothing more. I’m sure we all (male/female) feel like it’s the end of the world when you go thru a break up with someone whom you truly gave 100% and loved dearly. I’ve experienced bad break ups in my life, and I still continue to try again as u can see by reading my previous comments to others. this is also a reflection. it’s known that women tend to give their hearts more freely after break up even though they become more and more cautious on who they give their heart to.
and if you have to ask if this is by a scorned woman then you didn’t fully comprehend what you read. A woman scorned fucks your car up. makes scenes try to get at you. actually I speak to my ex’s almost all so that woman scorned doesn’t apply to me. I’m way to classy and get men so that isn’t necessary. it’s about how women feel after a bad break , being that your a man you wouldn’t understand that. I suggest you reading the blog again to give you proper insight. the person in the blog had plenty of good atributes. It was said he is a good man , with regular demons like any other person. this blog represents REAL Issues that people go thru I write about my experience , strangers experience, friends, family, etc. At the end of the day you feel hurt beyond repair until you give yourself time to heal,and dust yourself of and try again. You don’t change you learn to move different and be more selective. Quality vs Quanity
Pana
I gather from this you’re single and looking for that one who completes you. Wouldn’t it be best if first woman and men found happiness within themselves before offering to a partner? I recently seperatedatbirth from my wife because our lives became to much of a routine. Break ups allows us to grow for the better never feel like something better is not out there for you.
Thank you for your comment i wrote this post almost three years ago. @ Thomas Wyngate